Hope is a funny thing. All it takes is something small to give one hope. A look, a touch, a phone call. But for me, hope is a dangerous feeling. It makes me want to drop every security that I hold on to and run. Never looking back. Hope makes me want more than I probably deserve. Hope is tricky like that. But what’s worse is when hope leaves. Like when you finish a good book that has sucked you in so far you almost forget reality. You’re left feeling lost and confused. The light has left your eyes.
Tonight, that’s how I feel. I can’t explain this feeling or why I have it. I’m sitting in the living room at my good friends house thinking of every missed opportunity that had lead me here. Sometimes I think tomorrow will be better sometimes I know it will. But tonight I don’t see tomorrow. Only what has been. I’m sorry to all those who have felt this way or have been around someone in a mood like this. It’s not easy.
There will be a tomorrow and I can only hope that it will be better.